2024 in review

I know that I’m a bit late to the party but I just did a review on my year 2024 (which honestly felt amazing, I feel a lot more grounded now). For me a lot of things came together in 2024 and I’d like to share some of my thoughts on that.

The obvious and biggest change that happened for me musically was the release of my debut piano album in august. For years I had worked on my own tunes and ideas, and to bring them out into the world for everyone to listen to truly feels great.

My bass teacher once said: learning how to make music is a marathon. I often think about that phrase. For me it means that a lot the times when I make music I don’t see the progress right away - or I think I’m just getting better really slowly. (Of course this also has something to do with fact that I still spend a lot of hours per week in my day job and that I also want to have time for friends, sports and social activities).

When I think about my progress it sometimes helps to look back and listen to old voice memos (I often record musical ideas that I have on my phone so I won’t forget them while working on them). Especially when they are a few years old I can hear that my ideas are getting more interesting now and that my chords become more complex. Sometimes I also come accross a melody that I still like or I’m confronted with what I still can’t do yet, like adding a beat or create certain sounds.

I think that even if we don’t see that we are improving, a lot of the times we still do as long as we stay committed to an activity and also add new elements to our routines. Sometimes progress is just not always visible to ourselves and others.

So when I finally recorded my songs in January not only did I learn a bunch of stuff about the music industry (i.e. how do I put my music online, who has which rights, how does GEMA work etc.), in the following months I also began to shape my work and my musical identity more (by asking myself which stage name I want to use, if I want to name my songs in English, what kind of texts I write about myself and which of the work I can do without help, for example my album cover art work).

Those alone are really big steps but one of the most beautiful things for me to see was that a lot of my musical work of the previous years (basically most of my twenties) became audible in this project. The skills and ideas were already there but they were kind of hidden behind unfinished and unreleased compositions. Of course I could show some of the musical skills that I had in the bands I had been part of over the last couple of years but it is something entirely different to write and play my own tunes instead of someone else’s (don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love playing other peoples tunes and I feel honored to have played so many great songs that weren’t mine). Playing my own compositions in concerts and showing my work to people is something very personal, intimate and thus very beautiful I think.

I didn’t release my album for the fame or the money (although it would be great to have some of course ;-) ) but I see it as something coming from my soul that is there to bring moments of joy and peace into the world and makes my audience be completely caught in the moment. Sometimes people tell me how much they enjoyed listening to my songs and that makes me really happy. It is something that wouldn’t have been possible without the release of the album and the concerts I started playing shortly before.

Being immensely grateful for this opportunity (I will tell the story of how I got record my songs another time, it is a good one) I ask myself: what is there to come in 2025? I am a big believer of the fact that (if we’re not financially dependent on it) we don’t have to set goals all the time, that it is okay not to always improve and that we can also allow ourselves to float and see where life takes us. That being said I still have visions for my music that I want to achieve while trying not to pressure myself too heavily. In the future I want to add more voice to my piano songs, I want to learn Logic and make my first steps composing music with it, I want to work on my technical piano skills and the structure of my compositions. Also I want to continue to write here and come up with ideas for lyrics. I’m pretty sure that all of this will take more than one year. So yeah, I’ll be curious what my next review will look like and what conclusions I will have come to in about one year from now.

Sleepless Night

Since apparently I am in a writing mood lately - which is also very fun - I wanted to share the first songtext that I ever wrote. I did it a few weeks ago and also posted a rough version with some chord ideas on Instagram but I might still change them. Also I don’t know yet what this song becomes, if it is gonna be just piano and voice, if I’ll make something bigger out of it or maybe even nothing at all. I still like the words and the story that it tells.

I wake up at night a lot. Most of the times I fall back to sleep but sometimes when there is stuff in my life that I haven’t fully processed yet I start thinking about it up to the moment when it feels pointless to still try to fall asleep again. Usually I give up then, leave my cozy bed, grab my diary and go to the kitchen where I start to write, many times with a late night snack. I often write for about an hour or more - that is when I realise how much is actually going on.

In the song I wanted to capture this feeling of being awake at night left with the demons of the day(s) before. When I wrote the text it somehow took on a life of its own and got spookier than I intended. Also the unhappy love story didn’t exactly happen to me like this - but I am sure it happened to someone else at a different time.

By the way, after finishing my nightly diary sessions I often feel a lot clearer and falling asleep usually is no problem anymore ;-) So here’s the text:

Sleepless Night

I wake up in the middle of the night.
My Body’s turning from side to side.
Something’s cracking near the door.
Shadows creeping on the floor.

Oh sleepless night
ghosts of yesterday
haunt me now
in the grey.
Let there be some light
I wanna feel alright.

I’m in my house alone.
I’m starting to feel scared to my bones.
If only you were here close to me
we could chase those shadows easily.

Oh sleepless night
you’re a shameless thief.
You only take
but you don’t give.
I wanna be alright
I wanna feel alright.

Uuuuuuh :-)

You packed your bag and left me here.
Watching you leave I shed no tear.
But deep down I already knew
I’m gonna miss every peace of you.

Oh sleepless night
bring my love
back to me
so we can live long and free.
I wanna feel alright
I wanna be alright.
Will you return to my side?
I wanna be alright.

Singing Workshop

Singing used to be my favorite hobby when I was a teenager and it played a huge role in my life up to my mid-twenties. I was a member in several choirs and took (mostly classical) singing classes throughout those years. When I turned 25 I joined my first band as a piano player (sometimes I did some background vocals too) and I realized that I wanted to make more “modern” music (mostly pop) instead of classical music. In the following years I started to learn how to play the double bass and then the electric bass. I also became a member of different bands and found my first musical opportunities as a bass player.

As I began to play more bass and was still developing my solo piano project at the same time, singing became less important in my life because a day only has 24 hours :-) But I still kept my love for being able to fill a room with my own voice or the joyful feeling of singing harmonies with others in my head and my heart.

In my environment there are many opportunities to share things with other people for which I am very grateful. There are different circles of friends who organise festivals or smaller gatherings and often it is very appreciated if people contribute in one way or another to the event. For example, I have made music with different people as part of a musical program over the years (as well as taking cooking or cleaning shifts, doing artist care etc).

While being part of all these wonderful events the idea of doing a singing workshop with a group of people grew in my head (at one festival there bad been a duo of musicians doing a singing workshop already but it was before my time with these people so I couldn’t attend). When the opportunity arose to contribute to a small and private indoor festival that took place this fall I thought I might jump in at the deep end. Where else could I try being a workshop instructor if not at one of these little events?

So I signed up for leading this workshop and did some preparation. I definitely feel like I have enough to say and some knowledge to share through the years of my own singing experience. But I still felt a little insecure because it was my first singing workshop after all, I was afraid that too little people would show up and I didn’t know what would be the level of the singers participiating.

But in the end it all turned out fine. Quite a few people were coming to sing and we shared some good moments full of laughter in my body warm-up. When we got to the actual singing part even more people were joining as we were placed in one corner of the living room where everyone could see and hear us. We were even able to sing some parts of the songs in two voices. One of the things I learned is that it doesn’t matter so much which songs I bring (something I had worried about before) and that most of the people just enjoyed singing melodies and harmonies with the group. And we really sounded quite good I think :-) After the workshop was over some people told me that we also created a beautiful atmosphere for those not participating (some of the people in the room were doing a kitchen shift or another quiet activity). For me, that was a great thing to hear. So if the next opportunity comes up to sing with a group of people and/or lead a singing workshop I would definitely be down for it again.

A good place to share some thoughts?

Hello everyone! As I’m experiencing a lot of things (I’m sure we all do) and in my case especially in the music world I wanted to share some things with you. I will fill up this space in the following weeks hoping to entertain, inform and maybe even inspire you a little bit. Stay tuned!